5 Signs of Emotional Abuse
1. They are hyper-critical or judgmental towards you
“Now for the hitch in Jane’s character,” he said at last, speaking more calmly than from his look I had expected him to speak. “The reel of silk has run smoothly enough so far; but I always knew there would come a knot and a puzzle: here it is. Now for vexation, and exasperation, and endless trouble! By god! I long to exert a fraction of Samson’s strength, and break the entanglement like tow!”
2. They ignore your boundaries and invade your privacy
“Solitude! Solitude!” he reiterated with irritation. “I see I must come to an explanation. I don’t know what sphynx-like expression is forming in your countenance. You are to share my solitude. Do you understand?”
3. They are possessive or controlling
“Jane! Will you hear reason?” (he stooped and approached his lips to my ear); “because, if you won’t, I’ll try violence.”
“Never was anything at once so frail and so indomitable. A mere reed she feels in my hand!” (And he shook me with the force of his hold.) “I could bend her with my finger and thumb: and what good would it do if I bent, if I uptore, if I crushed her?”
4. They are manipulative
“But I am not angry, Jane: I only love you too well […]”
“you don’t love me, then? It was only my station, and the rank of my wife, that you valued? […]”
“Then you condemn me to live wretched and to die accursed?” His voice rose.
“You will not come? You will not be my comforter, my rescuer? My deep love, my wild woe, my frantic prayer, are all nothing to you?”
“Withdraw, then, – I consent; but remember, you leave me here in anguish. Go up to your own room; think over all I have said, and, Jane, cast a glance on my sufferings – think of me.”
5. They often dismiss you and your feelings
“Jane, my little darling (so I will call you, for so you are), you don’t know what you are talking about; you misjudge me again: it is not because she is mad I hate her. If you were mad, do you think I should hate you?”
” I keep telling her I am not married, and do not explain to her why. I forget she knows nothing of the character of that woman, or of the circumstances attending my infernal union with her. Oh, I am certain Jane will agree with me in opinion, when she knows all that I know. […]”
Comment
These quotes are only taken from Jane and Rochester’s argument in chapter 27, and they hit basically every single sign of emotional abuse. This is not to mention the specific manipulation tactics Rochester is using, threats of physical violence against Jane, and all the other shit he says and does to her before and after this moment.
Edward Rochester is an abusive man. From how he treats and talks about his real wife, to how he treats and talks directly to Jane, we can see a pattern of disgusting behavior that prioritizes his immediate feelings and whims over those around him, especially the women. The only reason Jane seems to feel anything for him is due to her trauma around how authority figures treated her. Edward showed her (not even kindness) less outright cruelty and humiliation. So she attached herself to him as the only man, or person, that didn’t shun her entirely. Edward took advantage of this, testing her loyalty and boundaries until he could confidently trap her into marrying him. All the while, knowing he has his wife locked up in his house, not telling Jane, and gaslighting her when she sees odd and disturbing things. He fully intends to marry her without telling her, and says as much. Personally, I don’t think he would ever truly tell her unless forced to like he was.
In conclusion, Edward is a freaking creep, abuser, liar, and should go to jail forever and ever.
Questions
Can he be held criminally responsible? I’m pretty sure there was still, like, a process you needed to go through to involuntarily intern a person, even if they were a woman.
Was Bertha’s madness truly entirely inherited? Or does she perhaps act out because she’s been locked up in a single room for years?
